Love Comes Softly

Remember that book? I think I was in eighth grade or so when I first read it. We have since enjoyed the movie and the subsequent ones. Lives were thrown together out of necessity and there was much grieving and pain on all sides. But slowly, slowly hearts began to open and love grew. In some ways the main characters (Marty and Clark, wasn't it?)  gained a richer love for each other because of the grief that brought them together.

I feel like this is a good picture of our lives with the boys. Our love for each other has grown slowly, almost imperceptibly at times. We have to consciously look back at how it was at first to remember how far we have come.

We are also aware of how far we still have to go.

Yesterday, Josh seemed fine when I picked him up from school, but by the time I sat down with him to help with homework he was hiding his head and crying. It took me several minutes to get him to make eye contact with me so that I could try to figure what was wrong. Turns out, he was devastated because a few days ago, I told him that I would get him some gum next time I went to the grocery store. I went to the store yesterday while he was at school but completely forgot about the gum. I know it was not about the gum. It was more of a question of "do you love me?" and "can I trust you?" It brought into focus again how fragile he is. It provided a good opportunity to talk about how much I love him and yet how even when I try my hardest, I will fail him at times. I reminded him that God will never forget a single promise he has ever made. We joke about my "old brain" and how it is easy for me to forget things, but that doesn't mean I don't think about him and love him. Today I had to take him out of school early for a doctor appointment so we stopped at Walgreens and he picked out some gum. I apologized to him again for forgetting the gum and reminded him that God is thinking about him all the time and will never fail him.

This is just a small example of the sort of thing that happens often around here. 

Isaac's recent challenge has centered around asking for what he needs. Kids who grow up in institutional settings often lose their voice. As babies, they cry for food or clean diapers or the reassuring touch of an adult. When no one comes, they eventually stop asking. Isaac will say (in a very small and timid voice), "I sure am thirsty." or "I wish I could have some milk." So we are working hard to teach him to use his words to ask directly for what he needs. "May I please have a drink?" It's a weird thing because he knows the words to use, but it takes confidence to express them in a polite but direct request. It comes down to trusting that we will meet his needs. 

Two cheesy smiles!

In addition to learning to love us, these two are learning how to be siblings to each other. It's not always easy, but we see the Lord at work as He grows love for one another in their hearts.

Forever Family....

We are daily reminded of our need for the grace of the Savior. How could we meet the challenges of even one day without Him? We have confidence that love will continue it's soft journey into our hearts because the Author of this story is love and He does all things well.