In Memory of Laurel

There is still a bit of a feeling of un-reality about that title. It is hard to imagine that our friend and her three girls are gone. We were at family camp with our church when Andy got an e-mail letting us know that she and her three girls had drowned in a flash flood in Wyoming. It was a blessing to be surrounded by our church family as we wept and tried to gather our minds around this reality.

Laurel helped us with our adoption for Moriah as well as the home study for our two boys who are still waiting for us in China. After we brought Moriah home, she came several times to check on us and see how we were doing. Her observations of Moriah were always so encouraging. Because she was also an adoptive mother, she really understood all that we were going through. She supported us as we found out medical diagnosis after medical diagnosis. She helped us not to stress about the trouble Moriah seemed to have in bonding with Andy. She gave us helpful ideas and supported us all along the way. She was bubbly and cheerful and her presence was comforting and reassuring.

When we began to think about adopting again, I was so excited to call her to get our home study started. She was delighted and surprised. She wisely wrote the home study in such a way that we could adopt one or two children. At the time, I kind of laughed and thought that was not going to happen. She visited with us several times. I remember talking with her about my own childhood and the loss of my mom when I was seven. I cried remembering. And I also cried because I know that our adopted children all face losses of their own. She was a friend that was easy to share with. (Only with a paper and pencil in hand as she took notes for our home study report.)

I called her and told her that we were considering adopting two. She talked through some of the issues with me. Then I e-mailed her and told her that we had changed our minds. She was still supportive and encouraging. Then I called her again and told her that we had changed our minds yet again and wanted to adopt two. She again gave helpful input and things for us to consider.

Our paperwork was tied up for several weeks as we waited for clearances from all of the states in which we have lived. She finally was able to finalize and send everything up to our agency just before she left on her trip to Wyoming. We got the message and e-mailed her to say "thanks" only finding out later that day that she had already died. Really hard to believe.

The Lord promises that He will use all things for our good and His glory. We trust Him. We love Him. We believe in His good purposes and plans. Most of all we believe that He is sovereign over all things. I do not think I will ever understand His ways in this...and I am comforted to remember that I do not have to understand. Only trust. I am thankful for the time we had with Laurel. I am thankful for the encouragement that she offered us again and again. I am thankful that she leaves a legacy of many little children who came home from China partly because of her work. I am thankful for the challenge that I feel to share my faith, to live each day for Christ, to hug my children and husband a little more, and to give thanks. Each day is a gift from God. He did not spare His own son, but freely gave him up for us all. When I think of Christ and his great sacrifice for me....His adoption of me, I stand in awe and can only praise Him. Even when it's hard.

Wednesday we will go to a service to remember Laurel and her three daughters. Andy will share some thoughts. We are praying that the Lord will be glorified. I would also like to ask for prayer for Alex, Laurel's husband. He alone was able to escape from the van as it plunged into the rushing water. It is hard to imagine his agony. Please pray that the Lord would be glorified in His life as he processes through all of this.

Two Boys!

(Joshua is showing Isaac the pictures that we sent him of us.)

What? You're adopting two?? This has been the question we've received a lot lately. And it is quite an amazing turn of events.

We were not really seriously looking to adopt again when we found out about Joshua. When we saw his pictures for the first time, we knew immediately that we needed to move forward to bring him home. But there was this little whisper in my heart. "Couldn't we bring home two?" China has recently begun allowing this. Two unrelated children can be adopted together if they are designated "special focus." Joshua has this designation. So I found myself looking at files of other "special focus" children. We talked about it a lot. Andy talked with our pastor about it as well. Finally, Andy told me to e-mail Pam, our friend in China who was advocating for Joshua. He suggested that we ask her how she thought Joshua would feel about coming home with a brother. She responded right away that most kids do really well. That it is a benefit for them to have someone to share this whole experience with. And...she included a picture of a little boy in her care whom we might consider. I was familiar with this little boy because I had spoken with her about him over two years ago. He had gone to Shanghai for a tethered cord release surgery about the same time that Moriah had that same surgery. We prayed for a day or two. Finally, we called our agency and asked to see his file and began to process to bring him home as well.

Zhu Xiao Chuan and Dang Xiao Hui...two little boys born in different cities in a land far, far away from us were planned by our gracious, sovereign God be brothers and to be our sons. We are in awe of God's work.

Now we needed a name. It took us so long to settle on a name for Joshua. But as we sat in church one Sunday, our pastor was reading the story of Abraham offering his son Isaac and how God provided a ram. I began to think of the name Isaac. Dang Xiao Hui and Moriah will be just four months apart. Her name also comes from this Bible passage. The name Isaac means laughter as Sarah couldn't believe that God would give her a child in her old age. And it seemed perfect. Isaac reminds us of God's provision on the mountains of Moriah (pointing ultimately to the provision of Christ). And we do have to laugh a little in the amazing plans of God to bring this blessing to us. So Isaac Xiao Hui it is.

Pam, who has Isaac in her care, made arrangements for our two boys to meet and spend some time together. We laughed and cried when we saw these two precious boys together. Soon to be home with us...brothers forever.

Homestudy is done. Soon, it will be headed to USCIS for immigration processing. Hopefully we will be able to get everything to China by September. And perhaps travel sometime in January or February. Meanwhile, we trust the Lord. Only he could begin this amazing adventure. And we know that he is faithful to us and to our boys.

What's in a Name?

We have struggled for weeks now to come up with a name for our little guy. For some reason, Moriah called him Bobby. Then Kimberly called him Little Dude for a while. We found out that his nickname in China is Guan Guan so we call him that a lot (and will continue to after he is home if he likes it). We talked about so many names, but with six opinions, it was tough. The other things that made it hard for me is to think that he has had his Chinese name for eight years. That name identifies him and has been part of who he is for all of his life. It is hard to imagine swooping in and giving him a new name. Yet, we see in Scripture a new name was often given when God established a relationship with someone: Abram became Abraham, Saul became Paul. We wanted a name that would be easy to say and spell. We figure he will have enough challenges without having to constantly explain his name. Yet we wanted one that wasn't so common that he wouldn't feel unique. I like having all of the kids to have different initials because it makes it a lot easier to write a quick note in my calendar if I can just write: K--Dentist. I know that's not a really big deal, but it did come into my thinking. We also wanted a name with spiritual significance. After many conversations, we have finally settled on a name.

Joshua Xiao Chuan

I hesitated with this some because Josiah and Joshua are quite similar. (And I won't be able to write J--Doctor in the calendar.) But those two will be virtual twins, so maybe it will be fun to be "Joe and Josh."

I have been thinking a lot about Joshua 1:9 since we chose this name. It is so fitting for him and for us. "Be strong and courageous!" He will need so much courage to leave behind all that he has ever known to become our son. He will also need courage to face the surgeries that he will need to address his medical issues. But we know the Lord will be with him wherever he goes. Joshua means "God saves." Very fitting for our little guy.

We found out today that he got the care package that we sent. He got a little teary when he saw the pictures. Our friend asked him why he was crying and he said he just loves China so much. It hurts my heart to think of all the he will leave behind. I'm sure we look very strange to him. Imagine seeing a picture of some big white people and thinking about trusting your life and well being to them. I can only imagine what his perceptions of life in a family in America are. It will be quite an interesting road for all of us.

The paper chase continues as we try to get everything done as quickly as we can. Be strong and couragous, Joshua Xiao Chuan, the Lord is with your wherever you go!

Ugh...Mom's Sick

I have never figured out why kids in China always pose this way. But they do...every time.
These two seem to be good buddies. Pretty cute.
Any guesses as to the ingredients in this soup? Sure looks like there's plenty of it!

This has been a long week as I have been fighting the crud. Andy has had it, too, but somehow he has managed much more gracefully than I have. I started to feel bad last Thursday. Really just laid around all weekend. Ended up at the Dr. on Monday and now finally, I think there is a light at the end of the tunnel. We have both had a great deal of congestion, so snoring wars at night have not added to our needed rest. It certainly makes me thankful for my normal good health. It also gives me greater compassion for my children when they are sick.

And I can't help thinking about our little guy in China. Who gives him a cool cloth when he has a fever? Or makes snow cones for him to eat when he is sick? Who sits in the steamy bathroom with him if he has a cough? Soon, the answer will be me...his Mama. I am eager for opportunities to show him love and care that he may never have experienced before.

We got some new pictures this weekend...very fun to see. We are fascinated by him, of course, but the background is also fascinating as we try to imagine what his day to day life is like. There are some newer pictures showing his spine as well. They are quite sobering. We are thankful for the treatment that he will receive, but we know it will be a long road. He will need an expandable rod in his spine which will be surgically expanded every few months until he is done growing. Ugh. But how wonderful it will be for him to be able to stand straight and have room for his lungs and heart to grow.

Our agency is estimating seven to nine months until we can travel, so we are hoping for the seven end of the spectrum. It is possible that we could have Christmas, Kimberly's Birthday and Xiao Chuan's birthday all while we're in China! Our homestudy is nearly done and lots of other paper work is in the works. We are all eager to have him home.

Zhu Xiao Chuan

This was the little face that drew us to adopt again. A little boy who has waited too long for a family. A family who has room for another son. A firm conviction that God has had all of this planned from the beginning of time.

Our journey to Xiao Chuan began in April when we received an e-mail from a friend in China. Pam Williams and her husband Clay work in Henan Province teaching university students. They also have a foster home called Swallow's Nest. Moriah lived at Swallow's Nest for about three months before we brought her home, so we have enjoyed keeping in touch with them. She sent an email asking if we were considering adopting again. She mentioned that she was advocating for this little boy who is eight years old. He does not live in her home, but she became aware of him through a friend who volunteers in his home. He had been listed for adoption as far back as 2007! Amazing to think how terribly long he has waited for a family. She thought us of because his special need is scoliosis. She knew we have been down that road to some degree with Moriah.

Andy and I have found ourselves looking at children listed on adoption websites during the two and a half years that we have had Moriah home. We would talk about adopting again from time to time, but never really felt compelled to move ahead. We had said if God put a child "in our laps" so to speak that we would be glad to add to our family. So the day that we got the e-mail from Pam, we were really interested. We talked about it for awhile and decided that we would like to see his picture and get more information. We wrote Pam back. When we saw his pictures we just looked at each other and knew. Our son.

So here we are...moving as quickly as we can through the dossier process. It's easier this time, but seems agonizingly slow as we are so eager to get him home. We have spoken with the orthopedic surgeon who takes care of Moriah and he feels confident that he can help Xiao Chuan with his spinal issues.

So we are stepping ahead in faith...trusting that the Lord has planned this for us and for him.

Blogging Again...

I have let the blog go for, let's see...just about a year and half. Amazing how fast time slips by! But thanks to Kimberly's prodding, I am back to blogging. Just in time to begin to chronicle our journey to Zao Xiao Chuan, a little boy living in Henan Province, China who will soon be joining our family. I am looking forward to posting more about him and our journey to becoming a family of seven. I am also excited to chronicle our lives together in the normal stuff that makes each day interesting. So, stay tuned! Sola Gratia is back!!